How do we make our baby leave my wife’s belly???
My wife is due today. Our baby remains in her belly. She keeps saying “I wish he would come out so I could see him and know he is okay.” My wife is really worried that he will stay in there too long and that she will have to be induced. Since we want the baby to leave the womb, we will be resorting to home remedies soon.
In the past, my wife has drank a mixture of lemon juice and olive oil to deal with a kidney stone. So now, what home remedies will we be trying (please feel free to suggest some home remedies to us):
- Taking long walks and hoping the baby starts to fall out.
- Eating spicy food – my wife dislikes Indian food but we will be hitting the Indian food buffet this weekend if the baby is still in the belly.
- Pedicure – my wife has avoided pedicures during her pregnancy because supposedly massaging the feet in a certain way can induce labor. Sadly, my wife unsuccessfully tried this method yesterday.
- Bribing the baby with the promise of ice cream.
- Buy him a Garmin so he can find his way out.
- Tricking the baby to come out with an elaborate scheme involving a Nigerian banker.
- Explaining to the baby that if he does not come out soon he will never be able to catch up on Breaking Bad in time for the new season in July.