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Bath time with our baby is no longer fun time with our baby

October 15, 2011

Back in early August I wrote a post about how bath time with young Zachary is just a wonderful experience. Oh, how times have changed. Zachary used to just chill while we bathed him. Now he spends the whole time freaked like he is being water-boarded.  Here is a basic run down of what it is like to bath Zachary:

0:01 – Wifey brings Zachary to the bathtub I have set up by the kitchen sink. There is a platform in the bathtub for him to lay down on so that he does not drown.

0:20 – Wifey lays Zachary down in the bathtub and Zachary starts to freak.

0:30 – I start pouring warm water on Zachary in an effort to calm him and he reacts by crying louder.

0:45 – Zachary pees in the bathtub and Wifey screams. (Zachary pees every time so I am not sure why she screams every time).

(Wifey has pointed out that our baby tends to react to scary situations by peeing which is not a habit that will serve him well when he goes to grade school).

0:52 – We decide that there was not enough pee to make us change the bathwater.

1:02 – Wifey washes Zachary’s hair while I hold him up trying to prevent him from drowning himself. Zachary continues to try and drown himself.

1:20 – Wifey moves to washing his body and Zachary reacts by finally getting calm crying louder than ever.

1:40 – I hold Zachary up so Wifey can wash his back. Zachary stops crying out of confusion.

1:55 – I put Zachary back down in the bathtub and he resumes freaking out.

2:00 – I wash the remaining soap out of the ten hairs Zachary has left on his head while he flails his arms like he is sure this is where I am going to finish him off.

2:15 – I pick Zachary up and pass him to Wifey who has a towel ready to wrap him up.

2:25 – Zachary finally stops freaking as Wifey wraps him up in her towel.

2:35 – Wifey and I are thankful we survived another bath time. We consider any bath time where Zachary does not poop in the bath to be a success.

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