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You want to bring me to a restaurant, you better be ready to entertain me

December 4, 2012

zachary at restaurant

ZACHARY: Listen Mommy and Daddy, I will make this clear. I am happy to go to a restaurant with you guys but don’t expect me to just sit there. I need to be entertained at all times. You better up your game if you don’t want me to scream and embarrass you guys.

We are really lucky that Zachary is actually pretty good in restaurants. We know other parents who would not even dream of bringing their kids to a restaurant because their kid would scream too much. Zachary, on the other hand, actually makes going to a restaurant a fun activity as long as we understand the rules.

RULE #1: Zachary will grab anything in reach so we must immediately move all plates, cutlery and…why the hell would they put a lit candle within reach of my baby!!!

RULE #2: Zachary needs to be noshing at all times. Zachary also loves to suck on ice for some reason – possibly connected to teething – and so the first thing we do is grab a glass of ice for him and keep handing him ice. We also bring plenty of cheerios to keep him noshing.

RULE #3: We also need to keep Zachary’s hands busy. Bringing toys is helpful if you enjoy picking them up as Zachary can’t throw his toys on the floor fast enough (that can get out of control real fast). Zachary prefers just to play with spoons, straws, menus, knives and anything else restaurant provided that we can hand him.

RULE #4: Though Zachary is a picky eater and won’t eat most things at home, at a restaurant he wants to try everything on our plate. We have been witness to him chowing down on an enchiladas to seeing him actually feed himself cheese grits the other day at brunch.

RULE #5: The floor/surrounding area is going to be an absolute mess and, no matter how much we try to clean up, we better be in the mood to tip well or be declared by the wait staff the worst else people ever.

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